I was at the Feroz Shah Kotla, playing a Ranji game yesterday. When I got off the field, I heard the news that Zaheer Khan has announced his retirement from international cricket. It brought back a deluge of emotions. I went home and started to reminisce all the moments I have spent with him in the Indian team – all those times I bowled with him and the memories I shared with him in the dressing room. I looked back at my initial days as an international cricketer and how Zak pa helped me to become the bowler I am today. He was my first idol, a role model who later became a very dear friend. I remember how on my first tour to England, in 2007, as a youngster cutting his teeth at international level, I minutely observed everything that Zak pa did – the way he trained, prepared for the game and how mentally focused he was. That was my first interaction with him and I ensured that I talked to him as much as I could. Very early in my career, Zak pa told me something that has stuck with me. He said, ‘Fast bowling is 70 per cent fitness and 30 per cent skills’. I have lived by those words right through my career. A very good example of what difference Zak pa made in my bowling was the 2008 Border-Gavaskar Series. I picked up 15 wickets and was declared the Man of the Series. Why? Because of Zak pa. In India a pace bowler’s biggest strength is the reverse swing. At that time, I could only reverse the ball in. Zak pa taught me how to reverse the ball away from the batsman – simple things like how your hand should be and where the seam should face. It was a very small thing but it made a huge difference. While he gave me such excellent technical inputs, he also kept reminding me that sometimes it is best not to get too much into technicalities and focus on tactics. At times, I tended to worry too much about things like where my right hand is loading and whether my release is right. He used to tell me, ‘When you’re bowling, just bowl. Just focus on where and how you want the ball to land, don’t think about where your foot is landing and hand is going. The only time you need to get technical about your action is when it is causing you any kind of injury. Otherwise, you just work on your tactics’. One of the things that made Zak pa such a great bowler was how he willed himself to succeed on the batsmen-friendly Indian wickets. Bowling long spells in India is hard work for a pace bowler. And Zak pa’s numbers at home (104 wickets in 38 Tests with three five-fors) are a reflection of his never-say-die attitude. He was always up for a bowl, no matter how trying the conditions or challenging the situation. He always said, ‘If you don’t bowl, how will you take wickets?’ I imbibed that attitude from him – rise to the challenge when the going gets tough.

This attitude also made him a fierce competitor. He also egged me on with healthy competition. During our 2009 tour of New Zealand, before the third Test in Wellington, Zak pa announced to the team that he was going to take a five-for in the match. I said, ‘Zak pa, agar aap sab ko out karoge to main kya karunga (if you get all the wickets, there will be none for me)’. He replied, ‘Tu is match mein thoda thanda le. Main out karunga (you take it easy in this match. I will take the wickets)’. We batted the first day and scored 379. On the second day, New Zealand were all-out for 197. Zaheer Khan’s figures: 18-2-65-5! That is my favourite performance of Zak pa because he lived up to his words. It was a testament to his confidence and determination.

I have missed that in the recent past, missed having him around, especially on the field. Since the time Zak pa has not been part of the team, my role has changed, as the most experienced pacer. It was a big responsibility. Replacing Zaheer Khan as the spearhead is not an easy job. When I first started playing without Zak pa, it took me a long time to adjust. I had to learn so many things along the way on my own. He was my rock. He would guide me, encourage me, help me form plans and set my fields. Now, suddenly I found myself on my own. I had to believe in myself, take my own decisions and take responsibility for them. I had to set my own fields and bowl according to them. Initially there were times when things were not happening for us as a team or me as a bowler, I would look around for Zak pa to come and guide us. One particular instance was the Centurion Test in 2010. Zak pa had injured his hamstring before the Test and wasn’t playing. There was a phase when nothing was happening for us. Hashim Amla and Jacques Kallis were piling on the runs and we didn’t know how to get them out. At that time I really missed Zak pa’s presence. I felt, ‘If he were here, he would have told us what to do. He would have made something happen’. As a bowler it took me a long time to get used to life without Zak pa. But I was able to transform myself as the team’s lead pacer because of what he taught me. No one knows how big an influence Zak pa has been in my life. He groomed me as a bowler. He took a young, raw fast bowler under his wing and made me a mature bowler I am today. I owe so much to Zak pa, and I cannot thank him enough for all that he has done for me. I will not play Test cricket with him again. But he has served the country brilliantly for so many years and perhaps, he felt it was now time to do something else. I wish him all the very best in whatever he decides to do in his life from here on. As told to Shirin Sadikot